Toddlers Without Tiaras

… tales of my threenager

Calling My Bluff … Bedtime versus Potty-Time

As you know, Big Sis is now potty-trained! We are out of diapers, and in to big girl underwear!
For those who cannot wait for this stage, just you wait! It is fantastic! Less money spent on diapers and less time spent on laundry! What else could you ask for?

However, before you get your hopes up – I must forewarn you – there are strings attached …

Before you potty-train your toddler, ask yourself:

  • Are you ready to have your life controlled by the bladder of a 3-year old?
  • Are you prepared to stop at every service station, Tim Horton’s, and rest stop, when you leave the house? Because, even though everyone went before you left the house, the second your set your cruise control a little voice from the backseat will cry “I have to go potty!!”
  • Are you prepared to call the bluff of a 3-year old, who thinks it is funny to constantly tell you she has to go pee, even though she doesn’t?

Ask yourself … even though you have already spent 50 of the past 60 minutes taking your Threenager to the restroom … do you really want to be wrong? What if this time she is telling the truth? Where is your time better spent? … 10 minutes in the Bathroom … or 90 minutes doing laundry because you didn’t believe her?

This is how I have spent the past 2 weeks. Each night we put Big Sis to bed. Each night she finds a millions reasons why she needs to get out of bed. … She’s thirsty. She needs a hug. She needs a specific doll. … At first we will humour such reasons.  Eventually Swiper the Fox* is called and she finally stays in bed.

I don't believe you - yet - I don't want to tell you I don't believe you.

I don’t believe you – yet – I don’t want to tell you I don’t believe you.

Recently, she upped her game. Using her new-found potty-trained status to her advantage, we are now spending many nights going back and forth to the bathroom … because she “Has to go!” I couldn’t help laughing. Our conversation went something like this …

Big Sis: “I have to go!”
Mom: “OK.”
Big Sis runs down the hall to the bathroom, situates herself on her ladybug potty. (Thanks Naomi for the potty.)

5 minutes later
Mom: “All done?”
Big Sis: “No. I have to go!” said with a smirk on her face.
Mom: “Oh, you have to go?”
Big Sis: “Yes.”
Mom: “Really???”

Then, in what can only be described as an oboe mating with a tuning fork, Big Sis proceeded to fake the biggest grunt, while screwing up her face and pushing on her stomach (to help get the number #2 out). Believe it or not, I was not buying it. I didn’t believe her. But … at the same time … I didn’t want to discourage her efforts on the off chance she was telling the truth. This saga continued for the better part of an hour, even the dogs put themselves to bed. Every time I questioned her, she told me she had to go. I could tell she was lying. Half the time she couldn’t keep a smirk off her face as she did it.

Well Big Sis – you’ve won this round. I didn’t want to call your Bluff.  As such, the Minions now have a 2-point lead against the ‘Rents on The Bluff Board.


* Note: Swiper the Fox is losing his effectiveness. Stay tuned for the next post Bedtime Stories … Swiper 2.0



Mon, August 25 2014 » Uncategorized

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